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Holidays and Women Just Can’t Get Along

Holidays are here again, and the world is so elated…or so it seems. Everyone falls in line with a certain frenzy that includes a jolly spirit that becomes even more excited as it spends money on things people don’t need. It’s all just a ploy to satisfy a person’s need to feel important and celebrated by others…but that’s another topic for another time.

Right now, let’s deal with the fact that holidays can be a real pain for women. Whether she’s a single mom or married without kids, a woman is always forced to face her deepest insecurities the moment the bells start jingling. Although holidays can be trying on any woman, somehow Christmas is the worst. The lights, the camera, the action—or inaction—is enough to drive any woman mad, and here’s why:

Christmas leads to burnout for mother’s

First, let’s be honest for a moment. If a mother has small children, she feels compelled to provide them with the merriest Christmas of all. She will go out of her way to ensure that the house smells like gingerbread, the tree is just right, the stockings are stuffed, and the children’s holiday costumes are ready to go! All this, while working a regular job and attempting to find time for herself.

Even mothers have to eat, you know! She wants so desperately for her children to remember the holiday as being one of the best, so much so, that she forgets her own needs. This is where burnout comes in. Forgetting to take the necessary time that one needs for themselves to regroup and rebalance can be a dangerous thing. True, giving our children a great holiday is wonderful but is it so great if we can’t enjoy it with them? Although many husbands do step up and become an equal partner to the holiday festivities, there are still those who don’t.

Rather than complain, most mothers simply accept the responsibility of making the holiday the best ever for her entire family. Very commendable, but not always the smartest thing to do.

Christmas cheer is a bit overrated to single women

Not sure what it is about the holidays that makes everyone assume that you must have a smile on your face 24/7. This is especially true for women. If a woman is not happy during the holidays, or if she dares go throughout the day without seeming cheerful, she is immediately written off as being negative or as having an attitude.

This may lead to her ‘pretending’ to be joyful, just to ensure that she can get through a day without dealing with constantly explaining why she just doesn’t feel like singing Christmas carols, or worst, exchanging cheap gifts at the office party. As women, we have become the masters of deception. This might be alright if we weren’t so good at it because it leads to our ultimately deceiving ourselves.

We become believers that the holiday is meant for families and friends. However, what does she do when she has neither? Can she be alright with the fact that she’s alone on the holiday? She would be, were it not for the misconception of what the holidays were truly all about.

There’s nothing wrong with celebrating the holidays, as long as you know why you are doing it. Avoiding the emotional attachment that society has placed on the holiday will be a huge start in regaining control of how the holiday makes you feel about yourself and others. It’s alright to hate the holidays for your own reason.

Just make sure that you don’t lie to yourself and pretend that you’re happy, when in fact you really want to snatch Santa’s beard off with your bare hands and shove his face in the eggnog… just sayin’.

About Audra L.

Audra L. is an author, columnist and community activist who's dedicated to finding truth through research and effective communication. She received her degree in Public Policy and teaches Community Development, Public Speaking and Communications Law to youth throughout the nation. She is the recipient of over 23 awards and honors for her commitment to community outreach initiatives.

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