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How To Recognize Warning Signs In Your Marriage

Marriage starts so blissfully wonderful that it’s hard to imagine anything could ever go wrong. You are both in love with life, each other, and the future you both hope to build together.

This is great, but what happens when time creeps in and takes away the joy you once shared with one another? Do you know how to recognize the signs which serve as messengers to trouble? If not, here are a few tips to think about when you are in doubt that your love is still alive and kicking.

Does he ignore you?

You can’t expect your spouse to give you attention 100% of the time, but it isn’t unreasonable to require a little TLC now and then.

When you add children, the stress of your job, and the demands of family responsibility to the mix, it becomes even more difficult to maintain his attention. If you find that your hubby is more interested in television, and less interested in the new nightgown that you are wearing to impress him simply ask him what’s on his mind. He just might open up about the things that are taking away his attention.

This will provide you both with an opportunity to build upon your communication with one another and further solidify the bond between you both. However, if he refuses to talk with you, and instead continues to ignore you, then you might want to ask him if he’d rather talk with you alongside a marriage counselor. Either way, you must communicate…either together or with the assistance of a professional.

Has his temper flared?

We all have a bad day or two. Don’t freak out if he is snappish or if he isn’t so nice for a short period of time. This is an opportunity for you to let him know that you are still by his side and willing to be a soundboard if he needs one.

However, if he is disrespectful in any way, then you have every right to set the record straight. Let him know that although you respect his right to have a bad day, you will not tolerate being his emotional punching bag!

If your husband can’t talk with you without being disrespectful, screaming to the top of his voice, or without listening, then you must take the wheel before things get out of hand. Simply let him know that you can’t have honest communication if he is not willing to speak in a manner that will allow effective communication to occur. Set your boundaries and stick to them if you want to maintain a respectful relationship that still works.

Has his phone become his best friend?

It seems odd to think that your husband would be suddenly addicted to his phone in ways you’ve never witnessed before. If he is constantly texting, he can’t put his phone down, and he guards his phone with his life, then you might want to pull him aside and let him know that his sudden obsession with his phone is concerning.

There is certainly nothing wrong with your husband having his own time to laugh with his friends, spend time researching items of interest, or listening to an audiobook or two. However, if he begins to act suspicious with his phone, simply talk with him about your concern. Make sure you let him know that you trust him and that you’re only talking with him to ensure that the understanding you both have continues to strengthen.

We would all love to believe that marriage is forever…but the truth is that this is not so. Although you and your husband might not share a passionate love affair as you did on your wedding night, you can both still rejoice in the solid love that has the power to make you both stronger. Love can indeed last with the help of effective communication and the willingness to keep love alive.

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About Audra L.

Audra L. is an author, columnist and community activist who's dedicated to finding truth through research and effective communication. She received her degree in Public Policy and teaches Community Development, Public Speaking and Communications Law to youth throughout the nation. She is the recipient of over 23 awards and honors for her commitment to community outreach initiatives.


  1. Wow! the things a WOMAN can do? Where is the list for what a MAN can do when the woman is “having a bad day” or “ignoring him by watching tv”?

  2. sexist slant much?

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